If you can’t find a group for your hobby, start one yourself. Most libraries have space to host groups, or you could meet at a coffee shop or restaurant. Try forming groups through social media such as Facebook or Meetup. [4] X Research source
Try to make the compliment fit the person. That is, “You look nice today” is a good start, but a better compliment would be, “You have an awesome sense of style. I love how much color you wear. " or “I love how your smile lights up a room. "
In addition, if coworkers reach out to you to start friendships, encourage the interaction.
You’re asking the other person to be vulnerable, so you must learn to be vulnerable in turn. Try to share personal stuff about yourself, as well.
For instance, make sure your body is pointing towards the person, and try not to cross your arms, as that can signal you don’t want to talk to the person.
For example, if your friend says, “I’ve been pursuing my own interests lately. " when you ask her how her and her spouse are doing, that may signal she’s having a little bit of trouble with her marriage and may want to talk about it.
For example, at work you may start talking to someone more often. However, it may be several weeks before you go out and have dinner together, just because of the nature of work friendships. Many do not move beyond the office.
In fact, you may find that the more you get to know a person, the more you dislike him or her. Just because you work with someone or live near someone doesn’t mean you need to be friends with that person. [19] X Research source
Try not to judge other kids by what they look like. You may think someone’s not like you just because they look a little different, but that person could easily have a lot in common with you. It’s okay to feel nervous at first! Focus on recognizing that feeling of fear and acting the opposite of how your body is telling you to act. [21] X Expert Source Christy Irvine, PhDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 9 April 2021.
For instance, you could say, “Hello, my name is Dorothy. What’s yours?” You can also use whatever you’re doing to help the conversation along. As an example, you could ask a friendly question like “Are you new to pep club?” or “How’s lunch today?” [23] X Expert Source Christy Irvine, PhDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 9 April 2021.
For example, you could say, “Hi, I noticed you over here, and I realized I’ve never said hello to you. Do you mind if I sit with you today?” The conversation may not go anywhere, and that’s okay! What matters is that you put yourself out there and tried making a connection. [25] X Expert Source Christy Irvine, PhDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 9 April 2021.
When you have someone over, that means you’re the host. In other words, you need to make sure your guest is having a good time. Ask the person what he or she wants to do. You can have a few things prepared to do, as well. You can tell if the person is having a good time by watching to see if she or he laughs and smiles.
As you get to know her more, you can make the questions a bit more serious. For example, you could ask him or her what makes him afraid or why he likes certain things.
For example, if your friend says, “I had a hard night last night,” don’t immediately say “Me, too,” and go off and what happened. Ask her what happened first. [28] X Research source If you’re not used to having this type of conversation, ask one of your parents if they can help you practice. Not everyone finds it easy to hold conversations with other people.
