For instance, if someone snaps at you when you offer a solution to a problem, think about what they may be trying to convey instead of dwelling on their rude behavior. Maybe you jumped into fixing things without validating their emotional experience. Maybe the person snaps at everyone because they don’t like getting constructive feedback.
Take a stand if someone is always pressing you to change your beliefs. A simple “My mind is made up on this subject” should do the trick. At the same time, don’t be afraid to open your ears to differing opinions or relax your beliefs to consider new possibilities.
Talking to someone else about it helps you release the negative energy. Plus, speaking about it aloud may help you to see that it’s actually not that big of a deal. [3] X Research source To limit the negativity, give yourself a time-frame, like 10 minutes, to vent. Then, put it away once the time has passed. Be mindful of complaining to a loved one about a mutual friend. It’s best to go to an unbiased third party.
Start small by making a minor decision without seeking any outside input. Perhaps you might select an outfit to wear to an important event without getting feedback from a friend. Gradually make tougher decisions like deciding on a travel destination or picking a career path. Of course, you don’t have to make these decisions completely on your own. It’s smart to do your research and bounce ideas off others. The key here is to not let others decide for you.
For example, if a friend makes a snide comment, you might mentally file it away instead of reacting right then. During your worry period, reassess the comment and think about how it made you feel. Then, empower yourself by brainstorming some ways to handle it You worry period should be about 15 to 20 minutes each day or as needed.
You dwell on negative events. You talk about frustrating people over and over again. You hold yourself back for fear of their opinions of you. You shout and argue with them or act outside of your values.
You might say to a friend, “Gina, when you nag about your boyfriend, it brings down my energy. I understand you need to vent, but let’s try to have more positive discussions than negative ones, okay?”
For example, if a friend tends to nag and complain, you might hang out with someone really upbeat, listen to positive music, or read a happy article before visiting them. You could also challenge your friend to say something positive after they offer a negative statement. Try saying, “Now tell me the best thing that happened in your day. "
You might actually take a short nap if you have time for it. However, other ways to reset your day might include meditating for a few minutes, taking a walk outside, or breaking to watch a funny video. [8] X Research source
You might list things like “I have heat on this cold day” or “My teacher liked my history essay. ”
Pause. Clearly imagine a boundary of water between you and others. Think of it as a peaceful harbor where your ship is docked. Remind yourself that you have the power to prevent other ships from passing by and unsettling your still waters.
Try the 4-7-8 deep breathing exercise. Simply breathe in deeply through your nose for about 4 counts. Hold the breath for 7 counts. Then, exhale slowly from your mouth for 8 counts. Repeat for several cycles. [11] X Research source
Go to a quiet place and find a comfortable seat. Start at your head or feet, moving throughout your entire body. Notice whether there is tension in each area—your toes, your ankles, your calves, your thighs, and so on. If you notice tension, breathe deeply and release it. Imagine it disappearing with each breath. [12] X Research source
Try saying something like “I am completely at peace in this moment. ” Say it enough and you’ll actually start to feel peaceful!
You might pray, marvel at nature, read spiritual texts, do charitable works, or meditate. Find a practice that allows you to build a connection with the universe and practice it daily. [15] X Research source